The Royal Wedding
OK, it’s not just my imagination. Prince William is definitely getting uglier!
When this kid was in his teens, you used to see a video clip of him on tv and think “wow, that kid got his mother’s good looks”. Now, just a couple of years later, it appears that that good looking kid has been replaced by a stunt double. Even worse, I think that the royal stand-in might have been the vicitm of a couple of serious rodeo mishaps.
What is it about the Royal gene pool that makes all these Buckingham Palace dudes so homely? Let’s be honest, did anybody think that Princess Di was attracted to Prince Charles on account of his good looks? At least fate finally straightened that one out when Chuck hooked up with his infamous soul-mate, Camilla Parker Bowles: She seems to be a product of the same inbreeding that’s responsible for Charles’ enourmous nostrils and equine teeth. These two loan a whole new meaning to hostlers term “matched pair” (OK – now I’m just being mean).
Anyhow – just like Charles and Di – this marriage between Prince William and whatshername can’t last. And I’ll tell you why. One morning – not too long after the wedding – the Princess of Wales is going to wake up and realize that she’s married to Don Knotts. And that she is obligated to have sex with Don Knotts pretty much any time he wants. And let’s face it, if you were Don Knotts, and you were married to one of the hottest chicks on the planet, how often do you think you’d want to have sex? A lot, I’m guessing.
What’s more, there’s going to be an expectation that she and Don Knott’s produce some offspring because … well … if they’re not having babies, what’s the point of having a royal family at all? And sooner or later, no matter how cute they start out, all of the little princes and/or princesses are going to end up looking like … Don Knotts.
